Disgusted.

I make myself sick. I mean, after all this drama with Aj I thought I was finally getting over seeing his face. But I still find myself looking for his smile among a hundred pictures, I just a post of his on facebook and I almost stopped breathing. I just want to be friends again. But he won't speak to me, and all he does is hurt me. I am listening to really great music and trying to enjoy a school night with no homework, but just seeing his name makes my heart skip like 10 beats, same with Dustin. Dustin is still my friend, that's fabulous. I just find myself hyper aware of my friends names, I do it with Becca and Katie. The closer I am to them the more I freak out about seeing their faces and their names.

Anyway, watching videos on youtube. That is mostly what I do on the computer. I listen to music and read books on the internet, and I watch youtube videos. It is where I get my news. I watch different channels for different things. Like TV, except......better. :)